AM (part three)

There are some things in life which we assume about ourselves. Negotiation with work related issues is something I love to do. But when you try to do same with family you realize maybe you are not that good a negotiator be it your own kids or your parents. Explained clearly to parents that B does not want to get hitched for a year and he wants someone good looking. Dad had an amused look.

Dad: So it’s decided we start looking immediately.

Me: dad he needs a year (god what have I been explaining the past half hour)

Dad: Yes I know but we start looking immediately.

(Repetition is a parental language by itself. Is it only my parents who keep repeating things again and again?)

After a good one week dad calls up again and says I might have to travel to some far off village in the interiors of south India which does not have an airport. So I am suppose to get off at some point which has an airport and go by a car for three hours to find this village. This was all that was said with me asking why but given only instructions on how to get there. (Obviously I cannot drop things and rush off like that since I just got back from India.) Why I had asked but nothing said about why what. So call up mum.

Me: why on earth do I have to travel to this village?

Mum: it’s the girl
(Here we go again)

Me: lets me get this straight the girl lives in this village which is like far off place

Mum: yes, but she is only working there her parents are in the city..

Me : so why are we going to go half away across some village where I don’t know anyone when we can see her in the city…

That was greeted with an OH…

This whole business is getting on my nerves since I don’t want to go and check out a girl as if she is a prized cow and then say no or something. I know of some relatives who have gone in bunches and big groups eaten the entire good south Indian food drunk the coffee and rejected the girl in the basis of looks…. I feel sins like that is something you carry for a long time… then again this is how an arranged marriage works the traditional one. I went through the same process but luckily the first proposal clicked.

The Makeover…….

Just like when the New Year dawns where my resolution to lose weight starts and fades by the mid of the year I decide its time for a change with my look. That’s because my birthday is in June. So this year just like last year I thought will go for a make over of my wardrobe. Usually its something more drastic like a hair cut gone wrong or trying out different make up (ending up like jojo the clown with the blush on cheek, still cant figure that bit of make up out). Since I had to go to Chennai last week went a bit cuckoo and picked out these new clothes to wear to work.

Walking into office in my new look my colleagues just stared. Why do I always manage to do the wrong thing at the wrong time. So now I am like an arty hippie type with all these kurta tops which should only be worn for yogi guru types and beads(definite yogic look). Even I have not managed to get to the yoga class which I have been planning to go to at least go the guru look right. Now need to stash this away and uncomplicated my life by slipping into my usual clothes and look.

Arranged Marriage Part 2 (AM part 2)

Decided that discussing with the brother (B) had to be done directly because if he was making puke faces I can’t detect from the phone. So went up to see him with the usual hi how are u.

B: Are you ok you look really uncomfortable

Quickly explained the conversation to him and watched his face turn a few shades grey. This is as much as I seen so many emotions run in his face (the boy did not cry when grandma died).

B: F____ F______ I don’t want get married I am running away

Right that makes things easy but I knew I was not going to get off easily with this answer because next my mom would pretend heart attack. So told him they are serious so give sensible answer.

B: shit man my friends kept telling me I will be the first one; I am so young I am so young (repetition of the same things is a genetic default in the family)

Me; I was nineteen when I got engaged, so u are lucky u should count your blessings or whatever

B: that’s tough luck on you, I don’t want to get married, and I am young only 24
(Puts his head down on his hand)

Quickly explained that the parents were not going to stop so option of running away is out and also the conditions they had put down. He looked downright pissed off when I told him about the three things they were particular.

B: oh ok so they have all this criteria let me get this straight whose getting married

Me: right do we have any preferences

B: yes I need another three years

Me: its out they won’t wait, I really cannot handle a heart attack situation

B: ok tell them to wait a year we ll talk about it then.

Me: do u have any conditions

B: she has to be a babe and young like nineteen twenty

Me: a babe? Nineteen twenty, don’t be sick. You need to be a stud to get a babe. I shall not let you marry a teenager.

B: you are going to pay back for all our childhood fights aren’t you.. Listen you have to put it off by a year.. How does this work

Me : well we exchange horoscopes, then it has to match then I go to see the girl if shes nice then u get to go but u cant say no

B: totally out I need to talk to the chick (chick?@@@ ) what if she is forced as well or something. Need to talk it out….

Well obviously this has to be handled delicately my parents are very old fashioned I can’t tell them he wants a babe so will have to be subtle and explain that beauty is important for him.

Arranged Marriage part 1

My parents call me up when I am really busy to announce that its time.

Me; Time for what (I am utterly clueless here since I was thinking time for what? For them to move back to India, or some astrological time?)

Dad: u know the time has come

Me: For what???? (Or this conversation was going to go forever)

Dad: We have found a girl (ok this is really ridiculous have they found some half sister who they had forgotten to mention, or are they adopting a sister… my imagination is really running in those few secs)

Me: a girl? For what
(Why can’t they talk what I understand?)

Dad: your brother its time for him, we have seen a girl…

(Did not see that coming my poor brother is 24 and I am sure he does not see that coming either but bit thrilled since I get new clothes ok I am vain)

Me; ok

Dad: is that all you can say? We have found a girl

Me: Who is she?

Quick conferring with my mom in the other end. They are sure it’s a girl

Mum: it’s a girl

(Right now that we have established that he is straight and we are getting him married to a girl can we get on with this)

Patiently I ask them some questions and the conversation just keeps around a girl. That’s all they have figured out. Then end of the conversation they were clever enough to point out that I am not acting responsibly I must check this proposal out. After half an hour conversation they have some criteria
She has to be the same caste
She has to be from a good family (god!)
Horoscope has to match...

And the only information I have is she is a girl. Unless I get a James bond to help me out (even he might find it difficult to work on that one)… Also I am the Chosen one to talk to my brother……. (I am scared)

Stuck in Traffic

This has happened again like for how many times. Today the road was blocked so much and was in the same road for one hour. In the midst of this the busses decide they will do a u turn on to the middle pavement running the road and go the other way. I was considering doing the same but was scared if the car would get damaged and stayed listening to some crappy music in the car.

Still no clue why the roads in and around Fort were so chock a block. Was looking forward to the weekend so much but was tired by the time I reached office a good one half hours later. Hope its clearer when I am getting back.

Superstitious Days, Bad omens and other stuff.

I follow a lot of silly superstitions like a prayer. It’s been unnerving but if a black cat crosses my path I freak out totally and try to reverse back or turn back. Logically I know the cat had to pass by my way to get to the other side and does not give a damn whether I move front or back. Ever since the day a black cat crossed my path and I just ignored it and found the baby getting dengue that evening (both were obviously not interconnected), I am petrified of black cats.

Here is a list of superstious crap that I am scared of
I don’t do any new deals on a Tuesday
Wont walk under a ladder
Get very upset if the mirror breaks
Wont open an umbrella inside the house
Will not visit a new place on a Tuesday
My old aunt said that seeing a dead body while u are going somewhere is good luck (Yes she was a bit gory in the head). I saw five dead bodies passing my way left right and centre near borella cemetery the day my mom announced my arranged marriage to me.


Loads of silly little things that I consider bad omen and good omen. Logically its all nonsense of course.

Now for the good stuff. I have laughing Buddha’s all over the place and rub their belly for good luck before a meeting. I try a bit of feng shui here and there and place flowers and candles here and there but since I am clueless about the directions am sure have got it all in the wrong places. Tried hanging some wind chimes in the balcony but found them disturbing the silence I love so much took it down immediately. Very specific about who I see first in the morning so will open my eyes and look into my hands (apparently the gods are living there).

I think I have left out quite a bit of other things and that sums it up I am really weird…

Exams are over!

Well not mine obviously but little D's exams are finishing tomorrow and i am so relieved. I probably can sit through the exams in my sleep since my head is swimming with transport systems, fractions, prefixes and combien? ouch actually my head is aching.

Strangely, my shopping mania has been put a stop i have not been to odel in a month i think (oh god i am rehabilitated) or for a coffee in three weeks (has it been that long). Then again i have been mostly house bound due to car being repaired too. I am so looking forward to a weekend in peace at last........

Tomorrow St. Anthonys Feast so have to attend that as well. I think will start off being free in the evenings religiously...

Seminars n sleeping

Had to attend a very uncomfortable seminar today. Uncomfortable in the sense there was no tables but only chairs provided. I think a table is a must for all seminars so that u can look down and pretend to take notes and sleep. I tried the other method of just staring and having that glazed look where I was in fact planning the whole year in my head. Since no one else from office came with me I was so bored even during break with no one to talk to. Suddenly saw someone smiling and the person came up and spoke to him, I had no clue that he was. God it was embarrassing then he said his name and I was like I am so sorry.. He was talking pretty well when suddenly the guy became very uncomfortable.

Since this has been a month of some weird happenings I was wondering what’s up with this guy turn around see a girl. He quickly introduces her and then conversation is like not going anywhere. Hemm well to keep myself entertained decided then and there that those two were an item. Said bye and wandered off to have tea. The rest of the seminar was eventful because I did not fall asleep, there was this loud snoring noise. The man next to me was fast asleep on the chair and he was so loud. I kind of kept poking him to wake him up since everyone kept turning to look at him and I was right next to him.

End of seminar he wanted to have a chat, ugh I wanted to run cause man had severe case of bad breath. I kept backing off to put a one mile radius between us but he kept coming closer. Was so excited yesterday that I can idle time today but by the end of afternoon was dying to be back at office.

Various

Had to attend a meeting at one of our private companies. The collegue who was supposed to come dropped out last minute since he had something else to do. I cant mention the name of the company obviously since that would mean trouble at work place. Anyways get to the place and find out the manager who was suppose to meet me had of course forgotten the appointment and gone off somewhere so his assitant would attend.

The pretty girl at the reception showed me into a room where there was this man of about 45 (dont ask how i know his age just guessing) was seated. He said hello and asked me to explain the project blah blah. All was ok except i was looking at his face and talking and he was staring at my chest. He was having this conversation solely focused not looking at my face. With all my big talk i was very uncomfortable and really wanted to cry. Its a bit silly maybe but it was really a sick feeling being started at by a horrid looking man. Thankfully this other guy A came in and said the manager had told him to talk to me and took me out of the room. When i stepped out i was so releived i did not even say bye to the first idiot. A was really cordial and nice and thanks to him the presentation did not get messed up. This has not been my kind of month now has it. First with the photo taking idiot on the road and now some frustrated man in the office... I feel sorry for the girls in that place....

School Play

The little ones school play was on last week. I had to get off early from work at least to change into that ever perfect dress that i had got. As luck would have had to lie about why i needed the leave by saying some crap at work. I sometimes cringe when the guys get off taking leave cause the kiddie has a play or need to go to docs (management oohs and aahs). But when the women ask for leave , how the management reacts like oh women always on leave. Anyways i could not get off telling i had to attend to car matters cause even accidents i get into are dumb, with a tree plopping itself on me.

Rush home with the accusing glare "mummy you are late". well actually i wasnt. The five year old was incistantly walking around me and asked what r u going to wear. Hemm first time he asked me that (the boy is learning going to make some girl happy after good long years). so showed him the dress (ok my life is ridiculous i am discussing my wardrobe with a five year old). he burst out crying loudly (this seems to be the case sometimes with kids). had to pacify him and he said i cant wear the black dress. Right. Then he proceeds to open the wardrobe and pick a saree then gives orders to wear something with lots of sequins mummy . arghhh

anyway get to the play me overdressed like a christmas tree with sequins. .( the saree was purchased in a moment of madness and has been lying in there without seeing the sunlight since purchase)..... Bling gone wrong But S with happy smiley face. The Man turns up takes one look at me and goes "why are u dressed like that" (ok if anyone wants relationshp advice dont take from me, cause if u are trying to fix things the black dress would have worked no christmassy stuff)..

Sitting at the play i could here all the mommies gushing about the cuties who they thought were in the main cast. Cuties were clearly there as birds or trees and non talking parts but the expectant parents were full of proud expectation (meaning they thought the offsprings were in a broadway play). I was really bored actually cause felt the play was a mess and then when s did come on to the stage with fifteen to twent five other kids and danced, i felt almost weepy (god thats the maternal instinct thing working). The high from the play kept s talking non stop with more bribes out of me to take him to pizza hut for all the hard work (twisting his hips for some funny music).

The mummy brigade pulled me and said "wow you look really dressed up" meaning (you clown u have no clue you look like u are at a wedding). well anyways sometimes we need to make a fool of oneself in the name of kids...

NDTV Programme on Bloggers

Last night was aimlessly flicking channels and came across this really good NDTV programme on “we the people”. I guess on Sundays at eight they have this programme on and address different topics. This was the first time I watched this and it was really interesting they debated on interesting titles like “The brave new world of Blogs” and “should blogs be regulated”.

They covered a range of different matters. What I caught up with the programme was people have blogs for different reasons like
Reaching out to strangers
Saying stuff that we wont usually tell
Getting on the lime light
Start conversation
Meeting people

They also did this bit about what is good and not good in the world of blogging. General not good factor was about anonymous comments but there were so many positive points discussed. I really enjoyed the programme; wish I had known it was on would have posted it before so that all could have had watched. There was so much said in it and I can’t cover it all here……

Nursery rhymes with actions!

Was stuck at a killer traffic when five year old S asks me to do nursery rhymes with the actions. So started off with incy wincy with the actions was getting really into it and just turned, saw a guy in his car with a shocked expression in his face. Turned back with pat a cake and out of the corner of my eye noticed s has slided right into the seat and it looked like I was driving alone with all this funny hand actions? The guy in the car must have thought I am bonkers. I decided shall entertain him some more and went on to do another rhyme. Oh god he took his phone out and was taking a picture. Arghhh trust the road to open up then everyone tooting and had to move. I was so annoyed ok it was definitely my mistake to do weirdo gestures in the car but he had no business to take a picture (I don’t know video it).
Isn’t that banned here like u cant take pics of strangers? I know that I should not have been continuing my nursery recital knowing someone was looking. I found it a joke so continued it……..

Secret Seven

Spider has tagged me have to thank her for distracting my mind from work since this should be attended to immediately. I am not going to tag anyone in the end of this since everyone has been tagged already so no rule explanation here…

Seven random /weird things about me…..
1 Totally superstitious, which leads to being petrified of black cats. Separate post should be coming up on this one.
2 I love to race other cars on the road and taunt the drivers.
3 Can be prone to mood swings
4 love books the favorite time spent is with books
5 since the age of ten have this vision of a knight in shining armour who is going to save me in troubled times (weird I know, but still believe in it and am definitely sure its hrithik after watching jodha akbar)
6 My intuitions are almost always right so have friends who keep asking me do I have any thoughts or intuitions about them (should charge a penny for each of that one soon)
7Love to sing…… ( glasses have not shattered yet nor donkey brayed at doorstep)